Quote:
Originally Posted by Nessa213
You mention that you've never transitioned, so am I correct in assuming that you don't take any type of hormone therapy? If you DO that might be playing a huge part.
I'd highly recommend trying to find a new therapist if you can. There are good ones out there that can work wonders without any type of medication.
It's possible that you may have an incorrect diagnosis that is making it even MORE difficult in finding the correct medication. When do you meet next with your pdoc? Try to explain to them exactly what's going on next time you see them.
If needed, you can check yourself into the hospital on a voluntary basis. A lot of people find this route extremely beneficial.
Good luck!  |
Hi Nessa213: Thanks for your comment! To answer your hormone question, no I'm not on any kind of hormones. If you saw me walking down the street, I'd just look like any other older guy walking his dog. And that's pretty much how everyone I know sees me... which is part of the problem.
There's the me I present to the world & then there's this crazy person inside who keeps trying to break free. I call her my fraternal twin sister. She never developed physically. But she exists locked away in solitary confinement within me. Unfortunately, because she has been locked away within me for so many years, she is now psychotic & can never be released out into the world.
Actually loved my therapist! Unfortunately no change was occurring as a result of our appointments. This is not really her fault. Short of causing a meltdown of the lives of those close to me, there's really nothing I can change at this point that would make any difference. This is my essential dilemma. It's becoming increasingly difficult for me to live as I am, but there's nothing I can do to change that would not destroy the lives of others.
Yes, I've had many diagnoses: major depression, bi-polar depression, OCD, etc. But, in the end, it just always comes down to: "okay which SSRI do you want?" (And I've been on several over the years... along with other meds as well. Now I'm on Cymbalta &, while it's not perfect, it's the best SSRI I've taken.
One psychiatrist wanted to do ECT. I know that it is safe & often effective... but I just can't go there; plus my wife would have a hemorrhage!
Actually, I'm doing better today. Thanks so much!