Tried talking again today... to no avail. He turned it on me, as usual. I asked him to please put his rubbish in the bin rather than leave it around. He replied by saying "But you do the same, how come it's OK when you do it?" He said I left an empty takeout box on the counter, which I admit to doing, but that only happened once. Still enough to invalidate my claims though, apparently.

So talking is out, it seems. As soon as I bring it up he reverts to brat mode: don't wanna talk about it, you do it too, you're not my mum, lemme alone. And the apartment looks like a pigsty again.

I'm burned out on cleaning... and on trying to talk any sense into him... We're not that wealthy but maybe I'll just go ahead and hire a bloody cleaner once a week, I honestly don't see any other way out of this.