This isn't going to be easy but I would like to give it a try.

1) The behavior involved: a pattern of negative thinking / putting myself down / blaming myself.

2) The emotions experienced: self-loathing, intolerant of my own stupidity / mistakes. Irritability. Helplessness. Hoplessness. Fear

3) The skills you may need: clearly I am new at this for I don't have a clue. I have been trying to break out of this for years and don't even know how to convince myself that I am not useless.

4) The mental processes involved (thoughts or self-talk, motivations, self-concept, values, and expectations): despite many motivations and self-talks, having high values - I seem to constantly strive for perfection. And always feel that I have failed when I don't achieve it. Constantly seeking approval and re-assurance despite not "expecting" it.

5) the unconscious forces that may contribute to your troubles: Traumatic first marriage - though I should be over it by now. Being overweight - emotional eating. Addictive behaviour.

I don't know what I have achieved here - I feel a little confused now.

Time to do some more reading.

Thanks for the opportunity to share this though.