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But why now, when I'm in my mid-50s and life is supposed to be more settled than this? And could this anxiety be a new manifestation of my BP, or something new entirely? I am SO SICK of this......everytime I get straightened out and reach something approaching stability, something has to hit the fan and F it all up. 
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I could have posted this word for word. So crazy that things can F up in a heartbeat for me, just when I think I'm around the bend.