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You admitted your guilt, and you are ashamed of what you've done. You ve been told that alll those wrong things you ve done are in the past, still you think that all those things are what you are today. That is not what you are , that is what you were. Today, you are conscience-stricken and may be stack with the thoughts of guilt and endless analysing of your sexuality and wrong/right sexual life over the time of your marriage.
I think, you need to try to stop focusing on what your body wants or does not. You need to replace your guilty thoughts or analysing ones with smth different: hobbies, sport, reading bible (will help you to understand that you are forgiven if you deeply repent).
Also, good to know that you and your wife are that close and you can share with her your innermost, you'd better to cut off on communicating to her everything coming into your mind as she might see you in a weird way after all and simply get tired of that.
The time you did your "experiments" happened to you because you did not know that not every thought and every sexual need you need to act on. Nobody taught you, that mostly in our life we have to stop ourselves from what our physical body wants. It wants nothing but find the pleasure. Physical needs took over your mind and soul at some point of your past.
Today, do not be afraid of your inappropriate fantasizing, try simply to ignore them. They just thoughts and they will remain thoughts unless you try to act on them.
I apologize for my post to look like an orders giving but I just empathize with your repentance and wish your family lack and wisdom to you in the future.
You might want to read the Bible, you won’t feel sorry for that.
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