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Apr 05, 2013, 09:32 PM
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Member Since: Dec 2012
Location: California
Posts: 2,248
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Quote:
Originally Posted by stopdog
I think it may be rather soon for such a thing if it is ever possible.
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Quote:
ECHOES: I don't think that you "need to forgive" in order to take some of the intensity out of the experience. I think you can learn to 'wish this had never happened' or 'I'm glad that I'm through that', 'thank goodness that is over', etc.. or other ways to frame it so that it is something you are moving away from, something that isn't happening anymore.
Grieving takes time and each movement feels a little better.
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I don't know if I would forgive. I struggle and go in and out of forgiving my ex-T who betrayed me, and her betrayal wasn't near as severe or costly as her betrayal of you. Somedays I can. Some days I see her as another wounded soul, and can recognize that what she did had more to do with her and wasn't about me. Sometimes I struggle with that. It's been a few years since it all started. The first thing I had to do was understand what happened to me, and with me, and accept myself and what happened. The more I could do that, the more I can think about forgiving her. That's a journey, not a decision, in my experience.
Last edited by Syra; Apr 05, 2013 at 09:45 PM.
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