I finally want to live! After wanting to die since I was five, I finally have reached the point of wanting life. I don't know when this changed, but it was just recently and I find the prospect wonderfully amazing after fifty years of misery. I feel like I want to speak at a suicide anonymous meeting and offer hope to others. Don't quit before the miracle happens. That thought always stuck in my head. Its been seven years since my massive breakdown. seven years since agreeing to go on meds. seven years of experimentation, trying to find the right combo. seven years of therapy. and its all finally come together and everything inside me chooses life. Im truly content. wow. there is hope. don't ever give up.