Sabina:

I saw your post before and wanted to respond to you, partly because you seem so down on yourself. So, you have some skill in understanding this psychology stuff.

First of all, you seem to have a clear picture of the five parts of any problem...and you described your situation very well.

For a discussion of self-criticism, see Chapter 6, page 128.
There is more about self-esteem in Chapter 14 too.

You may need to focus on really believing in your strengths and good characteristics. In the early part of Chapter 14 I discuss the new Positive Psychology. There are some tests that to help you see your strenths and your skills.

Sorry about your first marriage...I know divorce is very painful--I have been through two of them. But I know that we are capable of becoming better partners and of learning how to relate intimately. I have been married for 25 years to my wife. It is a wonderful relationship.

Are you perfectionistic about your next marriage or are you hopeless about that part of your future?

You can come to feel better about yourself. Get started on working on it.

drclay