I am in love, with a woman that to me is perfect. I know she has flaws and issues, but I accept them as part of her. I am not good at expressing my feelings, even worse at expressing my wants to her. She is an extrovert, where as I am more of an introvert. She doesn't have an issue expressing her wants to me, although how and when she does it, does irk me.

Due to certain circumstances, I am unable to buy her flowers or gifts without prior warning. We are also both very sexual, but don't have the time for sex more than once a week, and that is if she isn't on her period. Every time I try to talk to her about my feelings, I can never find the right words, and the words I do come up with and speak, are always wrong and have upset her on more than one occasion. It is easier for me to communicate how I feel for her in actions, whether it be holding her, kissing her hand, sex, and being there for her when she needs me to be.

There are a few draw backs to this though, firstly she suffers from BPD and when she is on the down side she doesn't even want to see me, and while I know this is not her fault, it really hurts. Secondly, we have time constraints due to external forces.

Thirdly, one of her friends will not just let us be. For example, this friend knows how little time we get together, and how hard it is for us to arrange more time together. We recently have been on two dates, and the friend knew we were on dates and still insisted on calling. I have asked that when we spend time together that this friend be told not to call or come over, but I am in love and when she wants for something, I can't help but give her what she wants. She wants to call her friend, who am I to stop her. But the friend then insists on coming over. In addition, this friend has spread horrible lies about my lover to me, and when I told my lover this was partly my fault? This friend cried to my lover and was forgiven, but while I was the innocent party, merely the person hearing the lies, I have received not even an "I'm sorry" from her. I don't trust her, with good reason because even now the things she says to me while my lover is not there make my blood boil. I can't tell my lover this as I have no proof, other than my word, and when I have hinted at this, she denies it as nothing more than someone trying to ruin the friendship.

I am at my wit's end with her friend, but find myself stuck between a rock and a hard place with what I tell my lover. I have told my lover that I am not to be a topic of conversation, not even what clothes I wear is to be discussed. Yet, knowing her as I do, and hearing things come out of her mouth that she should not know, I know that my lover talks about me. What do I do? How do I speak to my lover about this and still have her in my life? How can I tell her that the person she calls her best friend is nothing more than a two faced, back stabbing ***** that is trying to break us up, because that is how I feel.