In my experience, you cannot do anything until you move out, and even then they will try to get you involved and enmeshed while talking to you over the phone. But moving out will at least reduce the amount of pain for you, to a tolerable level.

You can TRY talking to Dad, but I doubt that it will work.

So, the practical problem of having him tell you about it is, in my opinion, unsolvable, because you cannot control his behavior.

The problem of feeling guilty, however, is solvable, because your guilt lives in your head and you have at least some control over it. It is very typical of children to feel guilty in your situation, but you can fight that tendency.