alters can be personalities that have totally become like a different person - they don't want to/can't be like the host so have taken on a completely different personality. Hope that makes sense. Or they can have similar personalities to the host but have different ages. There may be other ways to have insiders too.

Once you are aware of an alter, that part is also more aware of you, that is how they can hear/see what is going on. Mine sometimes sit on the outskirts of my visiual, watching what is going on around them. if they are asleep and wake up they don't know what has changed/happened while they were asleep. If I'm aware of this, I will usually give them the info.

When I leave for work, I'll say goodbye, see you later, as I'm closing the door. This doesn't mean they don't come with me to work. it just means that I am the one in charge while at work. I don't tell them about my work,or the people I work with, especially the littles. My insiders see what I'm doing but don't have access so I can stay me. This is important because of the community I live in - to protect myself. Also they wouldn't always know how to handle the situations. But it takes time and practice to find out what works with you and yours so be patient and don't force anything with them or yourself. Be your own best friend makes a lot of sense here - Be your insiders best friend.