why I are my relationships "fear based"? That is, not that i instill fear into my partner, but that I make decisions based on my fears and insecurities. For example, with my girlfriend, everyone asks me how it's going with her, to which i reply, in truth, wonderful. She is the girl of my dreams. Young, blonde, no kids, smart, college educated. But i get so pissed off everytime some stupid guy checks her out at the store, flirts with her at the restaurants, or the neighbor kids "visually undress" her. Am I being insecure or overly sensitive? f. I can see the downward spiral of me becoming controlling, manipulating, and mean based on making these decisions based out of fear. For example, if she gets gawked at, I get pissed of at her and take it out on her. That is not healthy! Ideas? Comments? Insults? HELP!