...well it's clear to me now I had an episode a few nights ago...and it had been building up for about a week. I'm just pleased I didn't wind up sedated chained to a bed and detained as has been the case every other time....that kind of thing can really ruin the day! seems I am learning that I can just lock all the doors and detain myself...which is much better I guess.

still feel emotionally and mentally violated!...and by 'myself'...or whatever supernatural alien energy lives inside of me.

..it had been so long since the last episode and because it arrived without the typical assault of negativity that I'm familiar with?...this is what befuddled me somewhat into really thinking I had finally recovered from pretty much every mental and personal affliction! (HA as if?)...but the energy kept growing and the alien subjugated me once again...and so I feel violated!

it's like a new and wonderful piece of life joins the existing one...and soon after a much bigger chunk breaks off!...therefore being worse off than before.

...now I'm just exhausted and irritable...restless

thankyou for asking ...I was just going to say I'm exhausted didn't know I would write so much

(actually I should know that when I set my mood as 'OKAY' for 6 days in a row..thats just ridiculous!)