Meta my dad died when I least expected it. I went over to see how he was, he was still working but had terrible problems with his chest at the same time his was on hemodialisis, I took him to hospital to have him checked out, finally they kept him in, I told my mum that I would stay a week longer so by that time my dad would be out of hospital. The last week I stayed more, was to bury him. It was terrible. I never expected it. I blamed myself for taking him to hospital for a check up and blaming myself that he had died so quickly. I thought if I would have left him in his job, he would still be alive. I feel so much pain for you Meta. Just one thing, we do recover eventually. This was my story and how I felt. Now I still have my mum that I love dearly but we are so far apart. 4,000 km away from each other. I still talk to her alot and my father's death has brought us closer.