I know how you feel. I have literally no one to talk to outside this forum. When I try to talk to my family they just shut down and turn away. They don't want to be bothered. I have no friends close by and the few that I do have are strong and would have no understanding. I don't tell them anything.
What I do do is see my Dr., take my meds, write in my journal, and keep in touch here where I don't feel like such a loser.
So find some nice people here. They won't shut you down.
Good luck