I feel like you try hard to convince me that you care about me. But when I finally let go and trust, you do something to throw a wrench in it. After that, I back off to protective myself. Once I do that, you try to regain my trust.

This keeps happening over and over, and I don't know if it is my fault or yours.

You do so many nice things for me. But then you do something that, to me, seems neglectful. . .it is surprising to me that sometimes you do things that you don't seem to realize are going to really hurt my feelings. Especially when we've worked together this long.

I don't think that you would ever be purposely neglectful. But on the other hand, you sometimes do things that are so obviously a problem for me -- things that we have had problems with in the past -- and if you aren't being purposely hurtful, then it seems like you are really clueless. And that makes me feel unsafe.