Thank you so much. Do you know of correspondence schools that take people that are not is the US? Maybe that would be my best shot, I phoned some of the places today to find out exactly why I next got in and the general answers are; " your mothers illness during your grade 12 year is just an excuse for bad marks" ( my mom was going for kemo at the time so I got a after school job to try and help pay the bills, I also missed a lot of school because the only hospital she could go to was 2 hours away so I used to go with her so that she would feel a bit safer on the train) ( after all we went through to help her she gave up and died) A lady at the department of higher education said that my chances of getting in where made even lower because 1. both my pairents are dead and the universities don't like taking "risky students" 2. I never went to private school and 3. My lack of " AA"( affirmative action) status . So as far as South African schools go my chances are very low. So depressing. Maybe everyone is right maybe I am chasing a pipe dream. Maybe I am not meant to do this. But what now??