Tomorrow is the day,,, per "protcol" I've had heart stress CT and caterzation, sinus CT, and lung CT - all so they can find why I can't get oxygen into my lungs. Scarring from repeated infections basically is the answer that the scans show.

The ENT specialist did a phsyc. exam on me - it was humilating. I bring out the absolute worse in MD's. I truly, truly hate myself......

Any clues on how I can get doctors to focus on my PHYSCIAL problems instead of my MENTAL health.

ENT doctor wrote " patient cycled rapidly thru depression and giddiness" - all in 10 minutes.

So GRRRRR. I was tired out- hence depressed, he said something funny and I laughed..hence the "giddiness".

So instead of telling me how to prevent infections and whether that is cause of my high CRP inflamation test, he wrote "she is disappointed that I didn't recommend surgery for her large sinus cyst." WHAT I WAS QUESTIONING was "are you absolutely sure that it is a cyst and not a tumor."

I debate every time I go to specialist whether I should put all my medications down - that seems to be a real thing with them.

I just don't know "what is it that I do in particular" to bring this out in them...Tell me ....do I hold my head differently or have a tattoo on my forehead that says " mental illness"?

None of the doctors seem to be able to track down why my CRP test is 27-33 instead of less that 5. Has anyone ever had problems like that?

Thanks for listening - I'm just really uptight about tomorrow.