Quote:
Originally Posted by douglas76
Guilt about my reliance, my dependence on this one person.
I can totally relate to this dependency…
Guilt a When she says something, when anyone says something to me, it gets analyzed and analyzed and analyzed, looking for what they meant by the words they used, the tone, the body language, the pauses and lack of pauses. Not forgetting the context of what was said. What I assume "normal" people would conceive as a normal statement I see as something else.
I do that constant over-analysing too…it's draining
An excuse not to see me. A reason to leave me. A criticism of me. Pity. I cannot help the way I feel, the things going through my head, but I feel like it is adversely affect me. More so my relationships. Which in turn, causes me guilt.
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Criticism really hurts, it really can strangle our inner core, even though there may not have been any intentional criticism and we just perceive it as so? Due to insecurities and lack of esteem etc? You also mention abandonment…I can relate to that, I cling onto people so that they won't leave me. I have BPD so that may be where that stems from.
You cannot help your feelings, you feel how you feel. I don't know about your diagnosis or circumstances but do you have BPD too?