Yes I feel like this sometimes too. I'm sorry for you losses and the things you have been going through.

I think it's Ok to trust yourself and that you will get your needs met as they come up. You need T now so allow youself that. If you want to experience reaching out to others more too, allow that. You can do that while staying with T or if later you need to take a break that is fine too. If you are growing and it is helpful then to me it makes sense to continue. I believe that there will be a time when it's right to stop, that staying does not feel productive, when that happen then go. You don't have to go now thinking that you "should" be at that place already.