Hi Douglas, Sorry to hear that you are full of guilt. I know how that feels, most of the time my husband has to do everything, I feel like a child, I want to be "normal" whatever that is. I know things have changed in my brain and I think I'll never be "normal" again. I was so desperate one night that I wrote my husband a letter telling how I felt about everything, it was never meant for him to read, I felt better writing it down. It was to make me feel better. Unfortunately at the time (I thought!)he found the letter and read it. It changed our relationship for the better, I know it sounds stupid I know but is did us a lot of good. Maybe something to ponder upon. Guilt is like a disease in itself, it can eat you alive. I 'm sending you the very best wishes and I hope that you may be able to unload some guilt beause its weighing you down