First of all, thank you for the thoughtful reply.
Quote:
Originally Posted by hamster-bamster
I do not know how long it took you to write the post. Maybe you took your time. So I cannot say from one post whether it is reasonable to believe that you are a slow thinker. You do not immediately strike me as someone who is a "slow thinker", but perhaps this is due to the difference between a written soliloquy and an oral dialogue. Is that right? Do you not know how to respond in an oral dialogue? Well, you do - you said that much...
|
Many of the thoughts in my post were just reformations of the ones that have been swirling around in my head the last few days; it's not like I could have sat down and produced all that in a single session of reflecting sitting in my chair.
Quote:
Originally Posted by hamster-bamster
On a different note, is it at all possible that you overwhelm people with your advanced and expansive vocabulary during oral interactions?
|
This is almost certainly not the problem. I feel like I could be quite charming with regard to my delivery if only I knew what to say (and by that I don't mean what kind of thing to say; I always understand what is appropriate). I always speak using appropriate register, and although I do aim to impress a bit when I talk, I am sure I am not putting people off with the complexity of my speech. I should also note that I am far more adept at writing than speaking.
Quote:
Originally Posted by hamster-bamster
So... let people talk. Many people really like to talk. Not everybody, but many people do. These people would not waste their time on "perceiving" you - they would rather have you listen to what they have to say.
Try those practical approaches - you need to start solving the practical problem, regardless of the personality labels.
|
The conversations I do have usually already involve the other party or parties speaking much more than I do. I do appreciate your diagnostic attempts, but I really think you overestimate my abilities. My problems lies, I believe, in the way I think.
Every one of those silly personality type tests tell me I have a personality type considered very artistic and creative (INFP on the MBTI, 4w5 on enneagram). The one thing about my thinking that frustrates me more than anything else is my derivative thinking and
lack of creativity. I literally cannot come up with interesting or insightful things to say in the context of the average conversation, especially when it comes to smalltalk. I think well within a framework (and so I write well academically), but for me to generate new ideas fast enough to have flowing conversation is something that has always seemed beyond me. Certainly the self-consciousness makes it worse, but it is hardly the root of the problem.