I had long-term therapy and I'd have to answer your additional question by saying, "both." I still have my T's words in my head with key phrases that I use now to help myself. I think the "build up" of experiences between the two of us over the year has been most helpful to me, again, the things "shared." Remembering the laughter, arguments, support, admiration for one another's gifts, etc. helps me now even better than a good book. The relationship was alive (which a book can't quite achieve, no matter how good it is or how good the movie is :-) and lives on in me and my life.