hey i feel like we are in similar situations. im 25 now and have also struggled since i was in my teens but never sought help.
i worry people wont take me seriously and i want help but yet i don't want it all at the same time. i finally broke down and made an appt with a T about 6 weeks ago and I told myself "okay you dont have to change anything and you dont have to even go back if you dont want but just go once and talk to someone" i know thats not the best attitude for change but it got me thru the therapists door! ultimately its going to be up to you though, you have to want it and you have to work at it. take small steps, sometimes even just thinking about what you could gain if you were free from your Ed or making a list of pros and cons can help.

sorry if none of this makes sense but i do really understand how you feel! i struggle every day with wondering if recovering is what i really want. it helps to just get those feelings out and explore what you're thinking about and get feedback from other people in the same situation.