My dog and best friend of 13 years died today, now I have no one to talk to when I get upset. An hour every two weeks isn't going to be enough to get through all that is spinning in my mind. I almost with you would throw me back into inpatient. I don't belong in the real world. I'm going to lie about everything on Tuesday because you wouldnt believe me if I told you. I've lost so much over my lifetime and I just dont see anyone understanding what has happened. Here comes the fake smile.