Hello rt and welcome to the forums here.

Sometimes it takes a while to get a reply here but eventually someone will say something

I agree that a note may be a good idea to "break the ice." At least give it a try. Have you talked to your counselor about being able to open up a little to friends? She may be able to give you things to try that might help. I think it might be easier for you if you had at least one person as a friend to whom you could let your guard down once in a while and get some good feedback.

Can I ask why on earth your dad gets mad at you for getting an award? Is he jealous or something? I hope you realize that yelling and blaming you for stuff has to do with something in his personality, nothing to do with you. Maybe he has some anger or disappointment inside that he is taking out on you. Even if you understand that it is not your fault, it is NOT a good thing to be hearing over and over from a parent that you are doing something wrong. It is very destructive.

Is there any chance of him going to counseling with you to maybe figure out what is going on and maybe work on a solution? It might be impossible to change his behavior if he sees nothing wrong with it, but hopefully with some support you won't let his behavior hold you back from a great future.

Good luck and feel free to post here often, it's good to get the opinions of others and it is also good sometimes just to vent.

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