Dearest "Tiger" -- I'm not going to use the word "hated" because you are NOT. My friend, you are being SO hard on yourself. Honey, you are no different that anyone else -- we have ALL done things that we are sorry for. Every last one of us. And if we get the chance, we apologize for it. For some of us, it's more difficult than others. But please BELIEVE ME, God KNOWS that we're sorry and GOD LOVES YOU!!! You are a child of God, and of course He loves you! He forgave you when you did whatever it was you did.

Why do you hate the way you look? Are you questioning God's work? Afterall, He made you. And are you that sure that you were THAT horrible a daughter & sister? What proof do you have? Does your mother still love you? Does your sister still love you?

You shouldn't cut yourself, because you'd be cutting God's work. Not only that, but you'll leave some ugly scars. You don't want that do you?

And how do you approach someone to apologize? I had to do that when I got sober -- that's part of AA. We had to apologize to the people we'd hurt thru the years, from our drinking. Yes, it was hard, but I HAD to do it in order to stay sober. You know what? It wasn't as hard as I thought -- and you know what else? They ALL accepted my apology gracefully! All I did was say: I want to apologize for my actions (then you fill in the details). I will BET that they will tell you something like "Don't worry about it." Or they might say "It did hurt my feelings, but I'm over it now." That's great isn't it???

So go ahead and do it -- and don't fret over it. You'll feel so much better after you do it, I promise. It's the same with the family. Just apologize and chances are you can start a new and even better relationship! God bless and please take care. Hugs, Lee