Hi my friend ~ Your home life as a child sounds JUST like mine. I was totally neglected too. Completely. And I was depressed as a very small child, and it never left me.

Both my parents were alcoholics, so it was chaos in my home. I isolated in my bedroom after I got home from school. That's where I stayed.

I did get married, but he turned out to be controlling, mentally/emotionally abusive -- and i was scared of him. I stayed for 26 years til both my kids were grown cause he threatened to take them away from me if I left. He would have too. After the youngest was 18, I divorced the bum.

I know what loneliness is my friend. All my friends dumped me cause my ex told them all kinds of lies saying I cheated on him, etc. How could I when he wouldn't let me leave the house? But, they believed him, so oh well. They didn't bother asking me.

Unfortunately we can't choose our families, but we CAN choose our friends. Have you tried making new friends? I know it's hard. It's difficult when you're depressed.

Are you on an antidepressant? Have you talked with your doctor about how you feel? If you ARE on an antidepressant and it's not working, ask your doctor to change it.

If you don't want medications, try therapy. Have you been in therapy? It really does work! I've been thru therapy and it really helped. You doctor can help you get into therapy.

If you want to get better, you must do something about it. Talk to your doctor!! He WILL help you! God bless and please take care. And let me know how things turn out, okay? Hugs, Lee