Well my Mother is 72.
I lost my Father in 2007 all of a sudden and I as the oldest daughter
was left out because his last Wife had a personal dislike for me. Why? Because I came from a previous marriage.
My family? is all screwed up. Just read some of my threads by typing my moniker.
So... I try to keep in touch with Mom, HOWEVER Mom will just not be proactive in taking care of herself. There is nothing wrong with her mind except she suffers from depression & bipolar.
I try to cheer her up, she stays the same.
She acts as though someone has just died. She is lethargic,depressive, and makes any & all excuses not to get out and be active.
When I used to work the counter at McDonalds in the early morning I used to see a group of senior citizens who would gather every morning after their walk around the Mall to talk,laugh and that one group really kept me going I'll tell you that! I was in my early 20's that year.
So, what I've done to cope because I have serious mental illness is that I wait for Mom to call.
I deal with isolation, its difficult to make friends here. Seattle is one unfriendly place to live. It is clicque-ish like I mentioned to Leed on here what its like is that your the new kid at a new school only no one will let you in.
Look up "Seattle Freeze" on Google to get further insight.
Anyway, I work EXTREMELY hard to maintain this illness in this crazy *** of a World, which isn't easy.
So what really got under my skin was when Mom called and so I'm excited because I was under the impression that she was going to come over.
Instead she says "I was going to come over but I'm in pain."
My thing is why call we didn't have any plans, not that she sticks to her end of the bargain on that one. So why call to say she can't make it.
That to me didn't make any sense.
I don't know why not surprise me come by unannounced...I have no relationship, no friends, I never have anyone sleep over.
I'm far too classy of a woman to EVER have those awful one night stands.
I'm trying but when I suggest she get help i.e.:
1.) Go to a support group for her chronic pain
2.) Use the paratransit shuttle van I worked hard to get Mom on to go to the senior center or wherever, these vans take you EVERYWHERE. She finds an excuse NOT to do that.
I KNOW that she won't be around forever! I lost my Dad suddenly due to his neglect & his insensitive Wife. But when I try, and all I get is pessismism and I've run out of patience then I must give up.
She won't change.
I'm just trying to be a good daughter & trying to spend time with her but she makes it difficult to do so.
Mom has always had problems with self esteem, mood swings, as well as a Histrionic Personality disorder.
No, I don't depend on her. I'm fine if I don't talk to her & prefer not to. because her depression just brings me down!
That's it.
Please only send me back a "Hang In There" No more analysis on Mom its a sore subject with me.
Read my Threads I've wrote on my Family to know more.
Have a awesome day!