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Apr 15, 2013, 07:40 AM
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Member Since: Mar 2013
Location: Missouri
Posts: 28
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All of my life I have fought depression, several times losing the fight but only to fight on another day. Lately I seem to be slipping back into that Severe Depression that tormented me most of my life. For the past month I have been constantly fighting with myself trying to make sense of my life. It seems that the more I try the more down I get. My support system sucks and I am running out of places to turn to. I am married w/ 2 great kids so I try my best to "Pretend" everything is fine. My wife, who is also a "Medical Professional" refuses to see the issues I am trying to work through. I am constantly being belittled by her. If I hurt, then she has to be hurting more. No matter what I do it never seems to be appreciated. I try my best to do what I can but being Newly Disabled I am limited on what I can do. I know it's hard for her knowing I am outof work and she is the sole support right now but why must she constantly throw that in my face. I constantly hear her tell people about her bad day and then she'll just look around and say "Well Somebody's Gotta Work Around here!" She thinks it's funny but it's like a stab in the heart for me! She seems to forget I was the sole support for several years. When our daughter was born and was Diagnoised with Spina Bifida she stayed home and I worked. When i blew out my knee, I missed 2 days at work, for surgery. She had a partial ligiment tear in her knee and took of 4 months. The whole time I never said a word about working non-stop. I can't understand why she can't be supportive of ME for once. I am suppost to be Non-Weight Bearing because of my multiple fractures and the permanent injury to my foot yet I am up every morning getting our kids Up and ready for school, getting her off to work, doing laundry, cleaning house, running errands even though I am NOT supposed to be driving, and making sure there is supper for her and the kids EVERY night. Not once, until now, have I ever complained. At night I am in so much pain I can't see straight and she'll just look at me and say "I don't know what your problem is I WORKED ALL DAY! I want to snap but instead I just sit there and take it because I feel so guilty not being able to work and support my family. I am running out of options, between the pain and aggrivation I am lost and have no where left to turn. I am to the point of just saying F-it and finding some kind of work even if if does cause more permenent damage. What else can I do?!!
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