... How do you deal with it? I feel like my depressed phases make it so much worse and vice versa. And sometimes when I'm manic/hypo, I just eat so much and/or exercise until I end up getting hurt.

My self esteem, it just hit an all time low. I realized that not only am I not losing fat from my stomach/thighs, but I AM losing my chest. I feel like a chubby twelve year old.