Speed, that sounds good. Hopefully, the doctor's charges won't be unbearable.

Keep after your psychiatrist to help you get admitted. I agree with most here that ECT may be the best way to go at this point, although there's some evidence now that magnetic impulses to certain portions of the brain help, and an implant that sends impulses to the Vagus nerve is helpful.

Amid it all, ECT seems like the most easily accessed help for you, in my opinion.