It sounds like you are just not emotionally ready to jump into Plan A. That's fine! Plan A obviously needs some support and you can work on that next, it's all good! All jobs/things we do have the parts that are hard or not much fun (in my case as an office administrator, the "filing" :-)

Get a job working with an orchestra, anything that will keep you around musicians; Best and Worst Day Jobs for Musicians even if just selling tickets to concerts. Get a job in a club so you can get to know other bands and see how they do "it" and what problems they have or plan ahead for a specific, even volunteer, gig (Renaissance fair?) and advertise for members for a one-time thing; that will take the pressure off of having to "maintain" it and help you meet people and let you get your feet wet, etc. But make yourself work on the confidence aspect and work on your portfolio on your own. What instrument do you play? Can you do weddings or anything? I know my stepson's wedding, the music backed out at the last minute and they ended up with a single harp player :-) Work in a music/instrument store? Register for giving lessons at a couple music stores? It takes time for anyone to build a clientele and get experience, no one goes directly from school to a full-blown, working plan/dream.

Everything can be experience and help you with your overall dream. Working for accountants, for example, you could learn how the business aspect works. Working selling, you can learn some of that too as well as people skills. Working as a waitress in a dive in the clubs area you can meet potential clients or club owners, etc. who can get to know/like you over time and help you in some way. A lot of it is about connections, about meeting people and it doesn't sound like you have set up your contacts yet. Make a realistic list of what you would need to form a band like you would like and work on the individual aspects (meeting people/having contacts; getting comfortable selling your band/self to people; understanding how much to charge and how much you'd backing you'd need to make X amount; what equipment and logistics you'd need (van to carry instruments/people to gigs, practice room, etc.) and be creative looking at ways to learn that stuff. Eventually it can all be about playing music but when you are first starting out, it requires a lot of other knowledge/experience as the "base" of your dream.