MM, I can SO relate to what you're feeling right now. There are times I get incredibly frustrated with being on so many meds and still having breakthrough mood episodes plus anxiety, that I want to simply chuck it all and start over again. The only reason I don't do it is that I really DON'T want to start over again, and who knows how effin' crazy I'd be if I didn't have the meds? That scares me worse than the current situation!

Like you, I've told people to thump me on the head if I ever try to take myself off meds or stop seeing my pdoc. Hang in there, hon......don't set yourself back.