Well if I really wanted to feel 'good' it would take an unhealthy amount of drugs probably. I can smoke some marijuana, for some relief though I probably have to quit that for complicated reasons even though its one of the major things that makes things a little more bearable deters me from causing harm to myself.

Aside from that I mostly just try to get on with my day, and force a good mood I don't really feel on the inside....its a struggle though. Its like constantly fighting to climb out of an endless pit of despair or something.