Hi Friend:
You're good to seek help for him like this, but the fact is that if he is resistant to counselling and meds, coupled with avoidant tendancies, then he is (IMO) likely to remain stuck.

I recently found an ADD/ADHD coach for my husband, who also tends to avoid dealing with his issues head-on. She isn't free, but she is much more affordable than a psychologist and some social workers. He seems to like her a lot. Of course, several years ago there was no way he would have considered coaching, counselling or meds, but now does all three. The meds needed to come first, in his case, to wipe away the apathy that prevented him from seeing potential for the other two to be effective.

Good luck,
LMo