It hurts me too much to think that therapy isn't somewhat about the relationship between my T and me. Most people agree, in one of the threads on the forum, that the relationship between them and their T is very important.

Do you also think it's wrong for therapy to be about her and me in the room? That's the way my T does therapy. It's NOT about her personal life, but about her and me.

It's absolutely true for you (and many others) that therapy is and should be about the relationship between you and your T in the room. That's appropriate.

But everytime you insist on knowing personal details of your T's life outside the room, you triangulate and actually dilute the relationship between you inside the room.

It might be worth exploring why you feel the need to create this distance.