ultramar: I didn't want to read your post to me because I knew it would hurt. It does, but I'm trying to pay attention to what you are saying, and not get defensive or ignore your comments.

What you write is accurate, but I think there is a middle ground. It hurts me too much to think that therapy isn't somewhat about the relationship between my T and me. Most people agree, in one of the threads on the forum, that the relationship between them and their T is very important.

Do you also think it's wrong for therapy to be about her and me in the room? That's the way my T does therapy. It's NOT about her personal life, but about her and me.

If I want to work hard to please my T, then that's where I am right now. I guess the bottom line is that a lot of what you tell me in my threads rings true, but I am where I am. My T is happy with where I am, and if it's still about her, at least I'm moving in the right direction. TBH, it may be that I'm not quite ready to apply what you have to tell me. I have to take reality in small doses. I hear you, and hopefully I will get to the point where I will not make therapy be about my T.