Romantic love has always been something of an anomaly. William Blake, one ofthe artists that drove the Romanticism movement, was striving against the same thing that you're talking about. Before that time in history romantic love, or the passions, were seen as something fickle, whimsical, and not to be trusted. Most marriages were arranged, or to put it in a better way, ordained.

The difference between loving someone, I'm hearing from you, is that spark of passion that makes a specific person special in a way that makes you want them. It may be some quality as obvious as really great abs, or good job prospects, but nonetheless does it for you. Whatever it is, it leaves you feeling like you must have and keep that person regardless of how good or bad they are for you.

The problem is that all passions have an end. At some point we all grow old, and what was exciting becomes just another day. We make choices to love, and be in love with those we care for. We also make the choice to fall out of love. You may not control your physiological reaction, but you can choose your response.

For Blake passionatte love was worth the uncertainty. For a great deal of people, even now, it isn't. Arranged marriages still exist, even within the Western world. You must choose what you want, and who you want. Even if it's a mistake it will be one hell of a ride.