Hi GotJava ~ I understand where you're coming from. But like Sam said, things didn't get like this over night. It's going to take while to fix it.

Are you in therapy? Perhaps that would be a good idea, if you're not. A good therapist can help you get out of this mess. i know it helped me alot to be in therapy. The depression eased, and I learned how to better cope as well.

Also, medication helped. In my case, my therapist said I also needed medication so my doc put me on it. It made a world of difference, and if you're not on any, perhaps you NEED to be. Talk with your doctor -- he can help.

I wish you the very best. Please take care & God bless. Hugs, Lee