Hoping to be able to catch up on the couch soon....hoping everyone is doing ok.

*** POSSIBLE TRIGGER - MENTION OF ABUSE ***

Had group T tonight...one guy has anger issues and one of the members felt threatened. He made it clear that he wanted to lunge towards the person, grab her and hurt her. T stepped in and tried to help him work through his anger - and then said that it would be helpful for the group if he could be clear about how his feelings and fantasies are just that - and that he wouldn't act out on those impulses. Initially, he wasn't able to commit to that.

....I told him I wasn't afraid of him. And I would rather he attack me instead, because I'd probably enjoy it (how freakish is that, coming from someone who was physically, sexually and emotionally abused). And, I told him that since he wasn't able to make that commitment - and T has always said that he would never have someone in group that was a threat for violence, safety is key - then I would not be returning to group.

He then made a firm commitment that if he were to be triggered by his anger that badly, he would not lay a hand on anyone in the room and that he would just walk out instead.

So.....I'm kinda struggling with something. Did I basically give him an ultimatum? Or, was I just stating a boundary and setting a limit? I'm kinda confused....