I'm sure you're not alone -- it's just that those people aren't posting.

I DO have to advise you to PLEASE go to an Al-Anon or NAR-anon meeting because getting your ex back would be very detrimental to YOUR mental health.

Why do you want him back? He's abusive. He spends his money on drugs. He isn't there for you emotionally. All he cares about are his drugs. Why on earth would you want someone back like that?

Do you come from an abusive home? Were your parents abusive? Is this the kind of life you're used to? Do you feel "comfortable" in this kind of life?

If you don't want to go to those meetings, then please seek the help of a therapist. You need to find out why you prefer to be with an addict! Why you would want to be abused!!!

I wish you the very best. Take care and God bless. Hugs, Lee