thanks everyone.

Rhap - im not sure exactly what it is that scares me. all i know is that if i start to get close to someone, i get so worked up that i eventually cut it off, or cut them off, and only after i do that do i feel any kind of relief. its like i think about it 24/7 and worry worry worry until its over.

i wish i knew how to fix it, but im trying my best.