ultramar, I don't want to keep contradicting you because your intentions are to be helpful, but other people in my real life, including my T, disagree with you. It's just your opinion that it's splitting hairs and I DO value your opinion. However, I KNOW the truth because I'm the one in the room with my T. I know what she didn't like when I asked questions about her H about a year ago. This was different. When I asked her if I crossed a boundary and apologized if I did, that's when she said: "You've known me a long time--more than 3 years." Unfortunately, I don't remember her words after that, but never was it anything about crossing a boundary! I guess we're going to have to agree to disagree. Okay? We can't possibly settle this, so I think it's time to drop it. I'll try do my part and won't talk about it again.