Well, I took Arvind (companion) on a ferry ride to Coronado (from San Diego) as I promised him I would. The terminal was in an area of construction, so it was tricky walking down there and no public restrooms. I calmly told the ticket agent that I would appreciate bathrooms there.

Then I came home to check on my progress with an online computer tech (removing a stubborn cookie) and a general tune-up and there was a rough spot: We lost internet connection and we were on the phone and I panicked because I could not get back connected. He told me, "Call me back when you calm down". and I was able to stay on the phone, apologize to him and get the matter resolved.

DBT is not a cure, nor is it an immediate magic pill. But I think it's helping.

I seem to do something that a counselor, once, told me, is called "shifting", where I "shift" from a hot emotion like anger to a cooler one.

I hate bpd. I am learning to hate the disorder and not myself.

it's hard.

I am so self-conscious about it.

I hate getting caught being overreactive.

Guess I am not perfect and I won't be.

I am also working a different shift and sleeping better. I seem to sleep better during the day than at night.

As a result of my sleep improvement, I am feeling more stable.

Carol