One thing is for sure, if you continue to use drugs (unless prescribed and not abused) and alcohol in any amount, you will never find any answers.

No excuses, ever, because that's all they really are. Are you trying to sober up alone? 12 step programs are good. Been there, done that.

This is one situation where it is black or white - there is no room for grey when dealing with alcohol and drug addictions.

Not to say you can't start over. Every second is a chance to start over. Just keep starting over every time you slip.

Altered State