Quote:
Originally Posted by Leed
First of all, I don't know how old you are, but it WAS none of your familys' business whether you stayed friends or had a relationship or not. Why didn't they approve of your relationship? Because of them, your friendship was ruined and because of them, you didn't see or talk to each other for a whole year! That's ridiculous!  |
Indeed... the root cause was the fear of disapproval by the family, and, since the friendship/relationship is 10 years old, you are not THAT young. So you should not be guided by the fear of disapproval on the part of the family. If you are still guided by it, you should change that, before another potentially good relationship is ruined by the fear of disapproval from the family. You probably cannot do anything to fix the current situation, but you can preempt future catastrophes by reconsidering your constantly deferring to the opinion of the family.
You may not be able to change how your family views / approves of your contacts, because you do not have control of the family. But you can control how you yourself act based on the fear of disapproval from the family - that part is within your conscious control.
I hope you become more independent soon!
Good luck.