That's the thing... I don't have guts. I'm always this shy timid little nobody who lets people walk over me. Yes, Perna, I agree it's bad, but it's not a habit. The reason I felt so good was becase for the longest time I havent' felt any emotion, not anger, not sadness, nothing... What I did was terrible, but I felt so alive!!! It gave me a little hope and opened me up to other emotions. I have never and won't ever do anything like that... again.
It just felt like this deep breath of fresh air after sitting in the smoking section!!!!!!!!!!