I agree your husband is a catalyst in many ways. Abuse on top of grief is not helping you. Perhaps pdoc is the wrong answer now. Maybe you first need to get out of your house and away from your husband.

Your pdoc is such a jerk. It's wrong of him to refuse help because you were unable to receive a text. Perhaps you need to get into a hospital regardless of the charge. You're worth more than money, Speed. I know its' hard because I have no insurance and put myself last alot, too. But, you're worth more than money.