I have self-harmed in the past for years. It's probably been maybe 5-6 years since I was regularly doing it. I started when I was about 12 with pounding my thighs until I bruised. Then I moved on to burning my arm with matches. Then moved onto cutting, which is what I stuck with. Really, once I started, it was hard to stop. And I still revert to it in times of crisis. At the height of my self-harming, I was doing it pretty much every day. It was the only way I got through the day and was what I looked forward to. I did it for the physical pain, for the outward sign that I was hurting inside, for the enjoyment of seeing myself bleed, for the release of negativity that was trapped inside me, for the comfort of the ritual. And at one point I had quite a ritual attached to it. I used to spend about an hour a day with it.